Telling People
Scripts, templates, and permission to delegate.
Telling people that your loved one has died is one of the hardest tasks of the first days. You don't have to do it all yourself, and you don't have to find the right words — these ones will do.
Scripts you can use
Phone call — close family
For parents, siblings, adult children:
“Hi [name]. I have some very sad news.”
“[Name] died [this morning / last night / today].”
“I'm so sorry to tell you like this.”
“The funeral hasn't been arranged yet — I'll let you know.”
“I love you. Take your time.”
Tap to select.
Text message
For friends, extended family, colleagues:
“Hi [name]. I'm writing to let you know that [name] died [today/yesterday/on date].”
“I'm not up to phone calls right now but wanted you to know.”
“The funeral details will follow when they're arranged.”
“Thank you for being part of [their] life.”
Tap to select.
Social media post
For a broader announcement:
“It is with deep sadness that I share the news that [full name] died on [date]. (You might prefer "passed away" — both are fine in a public post.)”
“[He/She/They] was [a sentence about who they were — a devoted father, a beloved friend, a gentle soul].”
“The funeral will be held [details / details to follow].”
“In lieu of flowers, [donations to X / please hold your loved ones close].”
“Thank you for the love you've shown our family.”
Tap to select.
The hard parts
Telling children
Use the word "died." Be simple, honest, and short. "Pop died this morning. His body stopped working." Then stop and let them respond.
Kids & Grief — age-by-age guidance
Open in the app
When you don't want to talk about it
"Thank you for thinking of us. I'm not ready to talk about it yet, but I appreciate you reaching out." That is a complete response. You owe no one a conversation.
Asking someone else to do it
Pick one trusted person and say: "Can you tell these people for me? Here's what to say." Give them the list and the words. People want to help — this is how they can.
If they filled in My Wishes in this app, they may have already chosen who should do this. Check their Plan tab under "My people."
There are ready-made text message scripts you can forward to the person helping you — or use yourself.
Quick text message scripts
Open in the app
See all 27 guides in When someone dies →
From bluetulipco.com/library/after-death/telling-people — printed 1 October 2026.
General information only — not a substitute for legal, medical, financial, or therapeutic advice. Read the full disclaimer.
Spotted something wrong, or out of date? Tell us.